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Any kind of comments/evaluation would be greatly appreciated.

I am applying to the following schools:

Swarthmore
Bowdoin
Haverford
Bryn Mawr
Kenyon
Scripps
Mary Washington
Muhlenberg
Washington (in Maryland)
Willamette
Northern Arizona University (my state school)

My stats:

SAT: 1330 (660V, 670M, retaking next weekend.... crossing fingers for a 1400)

SATIIs: 730 writing, 680 bio, 640 literature, will be taking Spanish and Math IC in December

GPA: 3.65 UW, 4.45 W

Courseload: IB Diploma Candidate, 5 IB courses this year, one honors math course

Rank: 39/564 (I calculated that on my own, my school doesn't rank but I am top 7%)

Prospective Majors: Psychology and English, minor in Philosophy or Music

EC's:
• founder and editor-in-chief of Literary Magazine, • founding member and publicist of Interact Club, • founding member and Committee Chair of Spanish Club,
• founding member of Nobody's Philosophy Creative Writing Club,
• Dead Poet's Society
• secretary, publicist of Mock Trial Club,
• anticipated member of Spanish Honor Society,
• member of National Honor Society,
• volunteering at middle school library (tutoring),
• Hospice volunteering,
• private voice lessons,
• Italian lessons,
• Chamber Singers,
• Varsity Choir,
• Northern Arizona Summer Program: Honor Choir, Vocal Jazz Ensemble

Awards/Honors:
• Outstanding Soloist Award (Chamber Singers)
• Principal's List
• nominee National Youth Leadership Forum- Law
• nominee National Student Leadership Conference
• superior and excellent ratings in Solo/Ensemble Festivals
• National Merit Semi-Finalist
• selected for ChODA and District Honor Choirs

Recommendations: will be from my english teacher, who taught me for two years, my Senior english and TOK teacher, IB Extended essay sponsor and Literary Magazine sponsor, and my math teacher who taught me for two years

My Essay:

My hands tremble. The light catches my eyelids, which flutter closed. Afraid. Voices murmur in the darkness. Waiting. The curtain rises and I am bathed in hot, sticky beams. The golden streaks of anticipation sting at my eyes and parch my lips. I cannot utter a sound. All around me is the buzzing of the crowd; my blinded eyes dart back and forth, searching the darkness, struggling to pierce the veil of trepidation.

My quavering fingertips grip the microphone before me. The metal feels cold against my palm; I strain a smile. A helpless sparrow beats its wings frantically within me. My eyes close and the stir of the hall recedes. In that moment of inner quiet my thoughts drift to my family and my roots.

Before I open my mouth, the soothing melody of a Hibernian flute weaves in and out of the flowing tapestry of my soul while a faraway drum beats in time with my heart. My eyes snap open. Awake. Suddenly, I am running through the Scottish highlands as the morning heather brushes against my bare legs. In another instant I am embraced by the fresh scent of Transvaal citrus. Now in a flash I am deep in the Hessian Forest, surrounded by trees scraping the sky with their branches.

And then I see only the strong white light glaring in my eyes. And I am floating. I am neither British, nor South African, nor German, nor even American for that matter. And yet I am all of those at the same time. I am the heather and the sweet orange. I merge with sea and sky.

The music starts and the little bird escapes from the prison of my throat and soars free. My eyes flicker open again. Only a moment has passed, yet I am no longer afraid. I think of those who came before me. They are here with me. With them my song will be pure and unfaltering. And so I will sing, but it will be with their voice, too. For I am not alone. I will sing, and our voice will be radiant.

By Chasgoose (Chasgoose) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 12:04 pm: Edit

Why not U of A instead of NAU for your instate school?

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 12:08 pm: Edit

Hey Charlie, no, I'm into smaller schools... it seems like everyone from DMHS is using UA as a safety though

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 12:14 pm: Edit

...and I suppose it's because of my NAU music camp (so I know all the music faculty up there). Where are you applying?

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 12:15 pm: Edit

also, any help for my essay?

By Carolyn (Carolyn) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 02:19 pm: Edit

You have some terrific schools on your list and a good mix of reaches and matches. I think you're all set. If you get your STATs up the reaches will become more realistic.
Good luck!

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 05:15 pm: Edit

bumpbumpbump

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Saturday, October 04, 2003 - 08:58 pm: Edit

how about my essay? (I'm planning on sending in my common app this weekend and would love any last minute comments/revisions to make it stronger)

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Sunday, October 05, 2003 - 01:57 pm: Edit

hmm... let's do a little *bump* here.... hehe

By Briteeyez4322 (Briteeyez4322) on Sunday, October 05, 2003 - 06:23 pm: Edit

well... no help on my essay... ok... it's sent in... nothing i can do 'bout that now...

By Wjk323 (Wjk323) on Monday, October 06, 2003 - 01:24 am: Edit

why did you already send in your applications???...most schools such as swarthmore, haverford, etc have deadlines like in January...

By Rubenizm (Rubenizm) on Monday, October 06, 2003 - 01:40 am: Edit

predictions:
you will either get in or not get in.

best advice i've ever given.