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It's from my friend, and she's applying to UVA early. I have bad writing skill, and I don't know what to edit. Help me out here!!

Discuss experiences that led you to choose an engineering education at U.Va. and the role that scientific curiosity plays in your life.

When I was a curious little girl about 10 years ago, I asked my mother, “Mommy, why do you like feeding me steamed fish?” “Because it’s good for you honey,” she replied. Discontent with her answer, I asked again, “But why, mama?” She said, “Because fish has protein and protein is good for you.” “What’s protein, mama?” I asked again as she placed a piece of fish on my plate. “Just eat the fish, Bell!” she responded. I was already tired and hungry so I held my tongue and picked up a spoon and a fork. I scooped some rice and fish on my spoon and continued to wonder what protein was. Suddenly, I remembered hearing the narrator, who was representing the soybean milk on television, rambling on about the ample amount of protein in a bottle of soybean milk. I thought, “Why is protein in both fish and soybean milk?” I was confused because I did not see any resemblance between soybean and fish. That night, I fell asleep attempting to draw up a conclusion to my curiosity. During breakfast, I decided to ask my mother but was interrupted by my older sister’s scream from the bathroom. Apparently, while she was washing her hair, she burned her eyes with shampoo because she wasn’t careful. I laughed and was distracted by another question: why does shampoo sting eyeballs?
At the age of 17, a lot of my childhood questions are still left unanswered because I am constantly distracted by new questions I raised every day. Through the success of the alumni and the current students, I believe that the University of Virginia has the ability to satisfy my curiosity especially the one with the fish and soybean.

By Glowingamy (Glowingamy) on Monday, October 04, 2004 - 10:51 pm: Edit

She doesn't want to give the impression that she hasn't already satisfied many of these scientific curiosities herself - tell her to not only describe her inquisitiveness but also many ways in which she has answered her own questions. For that reason the last few words I think are inappropriate (although the whole scenario is so cute!) tell her good luck applying

By Aim78 (Aim78) on Tuesday, October 05, 2004 - 10:05 pm: Edit

Oh, I thought this thread was about making an essay as ridiculous as possible.

Then I read the essay. Then I chuckled.

Then I read the response. Then I said, "OHH!"

Now I will leave.

By Lisasimpson (Lisasimpson) on Tuesday, October 05, 2004 - 10:14 pm: Edit

umm i dont really like it because it just seems like a story somebody would make up if they didnt have a real story..no offense, just my opinion.