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Now that I'm in, I've been thinking of how to adequately thank the teachers who have provided me recommendations at my school. I was thinking of buying them a gift and writing a letter. I wasn't sure if I wanted to give them the gift now, or when I graduate; I suppose at graduation would be more appropriate. Any thoughts?

By Northstarmom (Northstarmom) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 09:59 am: Edit

I don't suggest giving them a gift. Teachers write recommendations out of the kindness of their heart, and receiving thank-you gifts could in a way cheapen their gestures.

Presumably you also gave the teachers thank-you notes after they wrote the recommendations? I hope so, because that's when you should have written the initial "thank-yous" since one usually says "thanks" after someone does one a favor.

If you didn't do that, I suggest waiting until graduation, and then sending each teacher a very specific, thoughtful thank-you, letting them know what offers you got as a result of their notes, and letting them know specifically why you appreciated the education and support that they provided.

If you feel compelled to give a present, let it be something heartfelt and low key such as giving them a homemade plate of cookies or a mug from the school you decided to attend.

Trust me on this, though: The "thank-yous" that teachers most appreciate are the heartfelt notes that provide specifics about what the teacher did good that influenced your life and education. Most of the time when teachers hear from students/parents it is about some kind of complaint. Teachers work so hard, and it really does touch their hearts when they get a sincere, specific written note of appreciation.

Incidentally, I am writing this from the perspective of being a college professor who still treasures the notes that my former students gave me. I also love it when I get notes from them now with their career updates.

Make sure you tell each teacher verbally now about your acceptances. Do this along with a verbal "thank-you." Don't let them hear from the grapevine. They care about you and are eagerly awaiting word from you about your acceptances. They may not ask you directly because they know how competitive the process is, and they may fear that you have only rejections to report.

By Coureur (Coureur) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 10:00 am: Edit

Give it to them now. At graduation things might slip through the cracks and not get done, or they might leave campus early for their summers. Plus a gift or letter given now will be more directly linked to admissions rather than just to school in general. Also, a heartfelt letter that you put some effort into may mean more to them than a gift.

By Tri_N (Tri_N) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 10:29 am: Edit

In addition to the poster's question, what about counselors? Do we give them a gift?

By Connect4 (Connect4) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 10:52 am: Edit

im taking my teachers out to dinner. because they are my friends. it is a thank you for helping me out all these years.

By Northstarmom (Northstarmom) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 11:16 am: Edit

Everything that I said about teachers also applies to counselors. At the end of my older son's senior year, both he and I sent gracious, specific thank-you letters to his guidance counselor and to each teacher who had recommended him.

We did not give presents, but if we had, it probably would have been something like a mug from the university that S had chosen to attend.

By Flyguy (Flyguy) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 11:23 am: Edit

Why didn't you just thank them when they gave you the recommendation.

By Terpfan101 (Terpfan101) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 01:54 pm: Edit

yes i gave my two teachers and counselers a tiny gift and thankyou card after they wrote the letters, like in december. It was also a christmas gift. I gave one teacher my ap us hist.(my favorite in high school) a street sign that said go blue boulevard (U of Michigan because he went there and loves his school) cost 10 dollars off ebay, a 5 dollar box of chocolates. Then my other teacher a three stooges tie because he loves to collect ties 10 bucks off ebay. and my counseler a 10 dollar box of chocolates. The one teacher told his class (who i have friend in) that every student should be like me and thank the teacher after writing as opposed to wheny ou get in, because then it shows that you trust them to have done a good job. Anyway better now then never.

By Daggerlee (Daggerlee) on Saturday, April 03, 2004 - 02:03 pm: Edit

Well, I didn't write them a thank-you letter after asking them the first time; which I regret doing very much. I just never thought about it; at our school students almost expect teachers to write them letters. I did verbally thank them, though. It also feels kind of weird writing a letter when you can just go up and talk to them and verbally express your gratitude, especially since the teachers at my school are so personable.

Northstarmom, I was thinking very specific gifts tailored to their interests; for example, my AP US History teacher loves acoustic folk music, so I would be getting him a CD from one of my favorite acoustic bands. And I read this fantastic fiction book that centered around math, which I thought my AP Calc teacher would love. But you're probably right; a from-the-heart letter speaks volumes more than a CD or book...