Salutatorian Speech HELP

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Discus: College Admissions: March 2004 Archive: Salutatorian Speech HELP
By Mjl86 (Mjl86) on Wednesday, March 03, 2004 - 09:05 pm: Edit

What is the basic outline of the speech? I'm clueless about what to say and I am very shy (extreme introvert). I have very superficial ties with this school because I moved here recently. Plus, I'm the ultra brainy, dorky, type of person. I don't want to make a fool out of myself. Agggh, I'm confused.

By Crnchycereal (Crnchycereal) on Wednesday, March 03, 2004 - 09:44 pm: Edit

Well, as you've already pointed out, your connection with the school and student body is weak, so your speech can't exactly draw on personal experience to rile their spirits. In any case, tehre is no "basic outline" of a graduation address. It's totally up to you and the message is yours to make (provided that the administration approves of it, of course). I know nothing of you, so there's little I can suggest in terms of content. Just try to avoid those incredibly cliche "Now we go our separate paths..." bull unless you can turn it into a really interesting speech. Originality is great for such occassions. But if you really come up dry, then a generic speech might be best just to get it over with.

By Scorp (Scorp) on Wednesday, March 03, 2004 - 10:05 pm: Edit

You can always let someone else do it?

By Flyguy (Flyguy) on Wednesday, March 03, 2004 - 10:21 pm: Edit

That's kinda cheap to just recently move to a school and become the salutatorian/valedictorian isn't it?

By Memememe (Memememe) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 03:04 am: Edit

Not really. If you deserve it, you should be.

My sal speech should be like this, "Yeah, if I had worked a little harder in my life, I would be the next person giving the speech. Being a salutatorian (beaten out by a white girl) means that I should give myself a slice with the short dagger one of these days. Good thing I'm not Japanese. I guess what I really mean to say is that we're all winners."

By Mjl86 (Mjl86) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 10:45 am: Edit

well yeah,

it was a shock to some of the nonacademic students, but i was one of the top students and i thought i deserved to be val. i'm taking a ton of aps and college courses and my collegeboards are high... so there wasn't any argument about my being sal at my school

plus it isn't my fault that i moved

By Shahab (Shahab) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 03:26 pm: Edit

it would be cool if you gave an antiestablishment speech. i would have much respect for you. I would have done that, but i graduated about 315 people too low out of 460. I know a kid who dissed his teachers in his middle school valedictorian speech hes at harvard now.

Heres the outline

1)Start your speech with a black power salute and have some Militant members of the Nation of Islam flanking you on both sides.
2)Find out an annoying habit for each one of your teachers (that should be very easy), and snidely remark on it. They will try to stop your speech, but this is where the NOI members come in.
3)Find something your Principal is uncomfortable about (for mine, it was his height- the guy is about 4 10 with a Napolean complex.) Then, with a mocking smile, casually mention a conversation with his wife that brought up the preceding shortcomings, and how she complained that he was a poor lover because of it.
4)Next, talk about moving to the town, and eagerly anticipating the intellectual climate, and dreaming of the handsome fellas youd meet. Then say "But then I came here and only found stupid ugly trolls"
4)Finally- and this is important- get rid of your shyness! After your speech, before anyone has the chance to boo you (and believe me, they will), remove your clothes and STREAK!! Believe me, if they didn't remember you before, youll be indelibly etched in their memories forever now.

I sincerely hope you will follow this schedule that I painstakingly made. Remember, we here at only have the best intentions for you.

By the way, dont metion me if the police chase you down and book you for public indecency.

By Ariesathena (Ariesathena) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 03:50 pm: Edit

I've heard a few of the speeches, and the best one made a track analogy - how the 2-mile is a lot like high school life. Short, simple, engaging, to the point, easy to follow.

By Spacechic20 (Spacechic20) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 04:54 pm: Edit

"Being a salutatorian (beaten out by a white girl)"

what the hell does that mean? i'm a "white girl" valedictorian of 798 kids. whats your point?

By Yodisistim (Yodisistim) on Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 06:47 pm: Edit

I know that's RITE (Spelled wrong on purpose for the correctors)! I'm black, but what does the whole "white girl" thing have to do with you not being val? If Spacechic20 is, I can see why she would be offended. Clearly, it could have been anybody else.

By Aquaholic (Aquaholic) on Friday, March 05, 2004 - 03:30 pm: Edit

wow you guys are too racially concerned... asians usually get val and sal anyway!

Anyway- Mjl86 I just wanted to say YOU ROCK for moving and still being able to come out #2 in the class. That is quite awesome. Being someone who's attended three high schools, been screwed by various grading systems, and still ended up 6th in the class... I understand how hard it can be, especially if you move between different states or countries.

As far as your speech goes, talk about the few people (I'm assuming it's few, since you characterized yourself as shy and uber brainy) who have reached out to you and helped make the transition easier. You may not have the broadest range of shared experiences with your classmates, but even if it's something as corny as the massive paper you had to write for AP English or the Calc test that everybody bombed and needed a really extreme curve... it's things like that that will make your speech more human, less textbook, and that's what makes the best speeches. Another tip- if you're comfortable with it, feel free to reveal something about yourself that shows you're not as dorky as you may seem or you can make a joke about shyness and that will loosen up the audience. Good Luck!! Let us know if you need any edits, I love to critique :)

By Excusememixed (Excusememixed) on Friday, March 05, 2004 - 03:40 pm: Edit

"asians usually get val and sal anyway!"

Dayum, talk about stereotyping...

By Aquaholic (Aquaholic) on Friday, March 05, 2004 - 03:48 pm: Edit

i was joking :) read the rest of the posts and you might understand

By Emyh (Emyh) on Friday, March 05, 2004 - 05:45 pm: Edit

I wouldn't suggest dissing the school. A girl val a few years back basically told the school to go f*** itself, and the district doesn't allow val speeches anymore. I mean, if I was val, I would want to give a speech at graduation. I dunno about others, but it's a nice honor that not many people have.

By Miseryxsignals (Miseryxsignals) on Friday, March 05, 2004 - 08:06 pm: Edit

haha im getting off easy. at my school everyone with over a 4.0 culmative GPA is a "valedictorian." ALthough there is only one rank 1, kids ranked 1 to 20+ are all "valedictorians," and about 3 or 4 of them get to make speeches, based on auditions or something. Luckily for me, the "real" val doesnt have to make a speech if he doesnt want to :)

By Allibug (Allibug) on Saturday, March 06, 2004 - 12:22 am: Edit

Misery, I'm kind of in the same boat ... we don't have weighted GPAs or anything like that so, this year, we have 11 valedictorians and 5 salutatorians. No joke. And we _all_ speak at graduation. Every single one of us. Thank goodness they cut our speeches to 90 seconds this year, but still ... It's torture for the audience, but we're all about tradition! lol

By Scetoaux (Scetoaux) on Saturday, March 06, 2004 - 12:23 am: Edit

Mjl, I'm in pretty much the same situation. Only its a smaller class, like 20 something. I just moved here this year, the people haven't been so nice and I don't really have any friends at school, but it looks like I'll be the salutatorian. I'm also moderately introverted.

Plus, all these dumb people in my grade never let me forget that they've gone to this same small school since they were kindergartners and I'm still "the new guy". I dunno what I'll do.

By Memememe (Memememe) on Saturday, March 06, 2004 - 08:50 pm: Edit

Well, I've moved quite a bit, and I've gotten B's. I think getting a B and learning to move on is an important lesson that straight-A students may learn only too late. That said, I guess people just wouldn't understand the white girl comment. Trust me, if I said it, it would work. It's hardly a racial comment, and if anything, it's a stereotype against Asian guys.

By Mjl86 (Mjl86) on Saturday, March 06, 2004 - 08:59 pm: Edit

Thanks for all the advice. I don't like stereotyping, but I am asian, and the 4 asian people in my entire class are all in the top 5%...

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