| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 08:35 am: Edit |
Please let me know what I should change. The essay is in the profile. Thanks! (And yes, I know about the deadline 
...it definitely goes out today!)
Also... would anyone recommend sending this as the personal statement to another college that does not have an activity essay?
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 09:27 am: Edit |
bump 
It seems like everyone already sent their apps and don't bother coming here anymore! Or perhaps everybody is sleeping after pulling an all-nighter 
.
| By Daggerlee (Daggerlee) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 09:32 am: Edit |
It starts out pretty good, but there are some weak spots toward the end. Sentences like "Participating in mock trial taught me what probably no other experience has." are rather vague. You can replace "mock trial" with "terrorism" and it would still hold. Try to elaborate more, make it more personal and specific.
Overall, good, solid essay. Just tighten up the ending.
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 09:54 am: Edit |
I updated the essay. What else?
BTW...its 500 words exactly so it must be some sort of a sign...right?
| By Rennie059 (Rennie059) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 10:07 am: Edit |
I really liked it - I actually read it to the end, and that's pretty rare.
Still, I think the end line could use a little work... It's kind of anti-climatic after such a good essay.
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 11:14 am: Edit |
What do you all recommend for the ending?
Xdtish- rescue me!
| By Kingdvl (Kingdvl) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 11:42 am: Edit |
Uhh, Yale's deadline was the 31st of Dec. You're too late = auto reject.
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 11:50 am: Edit |
na'a. Its still good. Besides, I already sent in the P1 and P2 parts except the personal statement.
| By Xdtish (Xdtish) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 11:53 am: Edit |
TA-DA. It's xdtish to the rescue! 
You essay is FINE. Sent it in! :-) Where is your personal statement? Post that one up now.
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 12:09 pm: Edit |
http://www.collegeconfidential.com/discus/messages/5/43504.html
Yay!
| By Ndbisme2 (Ndbisme2) on Friday, January 02, 2004 - 01:03 pm: Edit |
bump
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