Essay on someone from the opposite sex...possible?





Click here to go to the NEW College Discussion Forum

Discus: College Admissions: 2002 - 2003 Archive: July 2003 Archive: Essay on someone from the opposite sex...possible?
By Almostdone (Almostdone) on Friday, July 25, 2003 - 06:06 pm: Edit

ok...first, before you start saying "nonono u absolutely cannot write about your boyfriend," let me explain. by opposite sex, i definitely did NOT mean BF/GFs or anyone you had any romantic interest in. But could I write an essay about a friend who is male (I am female)? and let me clarify, he is totally just a friend, maybe not even, maybe just an aquaintance, but he made a really big difference in my life just the same, and I would like to write about him in my essay as an individual who changed me as a person. (i'll tell you the story in a minute). My worry is, if i write a story focused on the admirable qualities of a male aquaintance/friend, will they automatically assume it's a mushy topic and discard it? or if i write it carefully, will it be okay?

specific story: I was wandering around the internet and somehow wound up on this kid's webpage. judging from his weblog entries, he had cancer, so i left a sympathetic comment in his visitor's log. He responded on my webpage and that's how we got to know each other. turns out he is a cousin of my cousin of my cousin or something like that, so we actually knew quite a number of the same people (the relatives in the middle). and then blablabla...and so forth. We thought he was getting better, but oneday the weblogs stopped and I found out he had died from heart compliations after the marrow transplant. Why did he inspire me so much? because this was a really hard time in my life, i was going through a lot, so my weblogs were often angry...and, despite having even more problems and the looming fear of death, this kid always had something bright and thoughtful to say, even thought he barely knew me! his own entries were often humorous and he joked about the physically painful things he had to endure, never complained, etc. In fact, his last comment on my page before he died was, "what's wrong?" When i heard he had gone to heaven, something inside me clicked and i realized how weak and selfish i was being, and i knew i had to snap out of it, and vowed to try to be a person like this kid, who always brought joy to others.

so. thats the story. of course, the essay would have a different organization. but just to fill you in. would the admissions people think i was being gooey or something, despite the facts that i plan to mention ?(he was a distant relative, a couple years younger than me, etc.).

Also, is it a bad idea to write about getting to know him on the internet? of course, i would tread more carefully, and not say things like "one day while mindlessly surfing the web" or sth, cuz that would make me look bad...but is it not a good idea as a whole?
just want your opinions. thanks!

By Apguy (Apguy) on Friday, July 25, 2003 - 07:45 pm: Edit


Quote:

Essay on someone from the opposite sex...possible?




No, they will think you are a tramp if you write about a man. Any man. Einstein even. Don't risk it.

Okay, I'm joking. Yes, it will be fine. Sounds like a pretty interesting essay too.

By Sunshine916 (Sunshine916) on Friday, July 25, 2003 - 11:07 pm: Edit

*tear* aww thats so sad. it would catch my attention!

By O71394658 (O71394658) on Friday, July 25, 2003 - 11:23 pm: Edit

Yes. But make sure it's not overly "heartstrings". Adcoms won't like it if you purposefully try to play with their emotions.

By Clickspring (Clickspring) on Saturday, July 26, 2003 - 12:02 am: Edit

So why does it even matter that he was of the opposite sex? If a person inspires you, gender is irrelevant. Go for it

By Apguy (Apguy) on Saturday, July 26, 2003 - 12:20 am: Edit


Quote:

Adcoms won't like it if you purposefully try to play with their emotions.




Good point.

Write to reflect your emotions well; rather than to make a sob story for an adcom. If you can portray your feelings accurately, your personality will seem much more genuine rather than making your essay seem like some processed story that in reality means nothing to you. So as long as you don't overdo it I think you will have a good essay.


Report an offensive message on this page    E-mail this page to a friend
Posting is currently disabled in this topic. Contact your discussion moderator for more information.

Administrator's Control Panel -- Board Moderators Only
Administer Page