Question: I’m a good student, active in many extracurriculars, and have maintained a 3.9. However, this past summer I made a poor decision and was charged with a misdemeanor. The consequences of my actions however, changed my entire outlook on life. I was wondering if it would be a good or bad idea to write my essay about this experience?

If you’re comfortable telling me what your “poor decision” was, I can better advise you. Also, since it was in the summer, can I assume that this didn’t affect your school record … no disciplinary action at school, suspension, etc.?

Sometimes these “true confessions” essays can be worthwhile, but in other cases they can be what my 12-year-old son calls “TMI” … i.e., “Too Much Information.” While, for most colleges, you will have to reveal your misdeed anyway (more on that in a minute), the typical high school misdemeanor (e.g., sharing a beer beneath the baseball bleachers or even a joint in the local park) is rarely application essay fodder. Even if you learned some important lessons about honesty or peer pressure or trust, this will probably not be what you want as the “centerfold” of your application. There are surely other strengths, talents, interests, etc. of yours that should take a more starring role. But, again, it’s hard for me to say for sure without knowing the details. (And, of course, if you’re a terrific writer, you can write about pretty much anything.)

The Common Application (and many others … though not all) will ask you, “Have you ever been convicted of a misdemeanor, felony, or other crime?” So you do have to respond honestly, and–whenever the answer is “YES”– it’s important to include a statement that explains what you did and what you learned from this experience. In such cases, if you succumbed to peer pressure, it’s fine to say so, but be sure that you also assume responsibility for your own actions and not foist all of the blame onto others.

But, by conveying this information in a supplementary letter or essay and by writing your primary college essay about something else, you will send a message to colleges that proclaims, “Yes, I did screw up, but this doesn’t define who I am. There are other aspects of my life that are far more important.”

After all, college applications give you very little space to reveal the real you, and you may want to use your required essay to show what is truly special–and wonderful–about you and to let your lapse in judgment take a back seat, even if you feel that you matured or changed because of it.

Question: My daughter has applied for binding Early Decision at a highly selective private college. (Applications are due tomorrow, but she’s submitted hers already.) She is having second thoughts about this school being her first and only choice. We will not receive the decision from the college until December. Would you recommend I call the admissions department and withdraw the ED binding agreement and ask to have her application placed with the regular pool of applicants? I feel this would be the most honest and ethical way to handle it.

Since your daughter seems to have cold feet, it’s wise to move her application into the Regular-Decision pool. However, as you and your daughter probably realize, there is usually an admissions-odds boost that comes with an Early Decision application. So your daughter will forfeit this advantage if she decides against applying ED. But she will not be otherwise penalized for this last-minute change of heart. In the past, I’ve seen families in a similar situation who have worried that there will be some sort of “black mark” stamped on the application folder that says “Fickle!” But there won’t be, and I do agree that, if your daughter is concerned that she may not be making the right choice, it’s smart to reconsider now.

The only other suggestion I can offer is that your daughter should make the call herself, and she should be sure to get the name of the person she spoke with. She will probably be told to follow up in writing and may be asked to have her school counselor do the same. While she will most likely speak with a secretary, and it might not make a difference that she she made the call–not you, it’s still prudent for her to take charge of this sticky situation on her own. There’s always a chance that she will be connected with the staff member who oversees her high school, so she should be steeled for that possibility as she dials. (Does anyone say “Dial” anymore?)

Good luck to her … and to you … whatever she decides.

Question: Some of my son’s friends are plotting an Early Decision strategy that entails applying to a first-choice college in the Early Decision I round. Then if they are deferred (not even denied outright) they plan to apply to a second-choice college in the ED II round without ever knowing if they might have gotten into their first choice. Is this legal? Ethical? What do you think about it?

This ED I/ED II gambit has been around for a while, and I’ve seen it in action many times. Frankly, I’m a fan … at least in some cases. Although conventional wisdom suggests that a student should only apply via a binding Early Decision program when he or she has a clear-cut top-choice college, I actually find that many seniors have several colleges where they’re convinced they will be happy and engaged. So … I don’t think it’s unreasonable to select one of these schools as the top-choice candidate for the first round of Early Decision but, then, if the news isn’t good, to give the second choice a shot in the ED II round, rather than waiting for a final verdict from the #1 school in April.

PROS and CONS?

First the pluses:

Early Decision, whether it’s Round I or Round II, typically boosts admission odds, sometimes really significantly. It’s the old bird-in-hand-theory. That is, colleges are more apt to say yes to borderline applicants in an ED round, knowing that they are committed to enroll.

Sometimes, at “need-conscious” colleges, borderline ED applicants who need significant money will be admitted and aided, while similar Regular Decision applicants with comparable financial need may not make the final cut.

Even though ED II students usually have to apply to other colleges (because ED II decisions won’t be issued until after many Regular Decision deadlines have passed), it can still take the heat off of senior year to get good news in February while classmates are sweating bullets over spring outcomes.

Now … the drawbacks:

Students who are deferred from first-choice colleges in December and then admitted via ED II to second-choice schools may spend the rest of their lives roaming the planet and muttering lines from “The Road Not Taken,” as they wonder what might have been. So, I recommend that only those who find little difference in their passion for their ED I and ED II colleges should follow this route.

Sometimes–though not always–colleges with merit aid don’t make their best offers to “sure-thing” ED applicants, hoping instead to reel in some big but undecided fish in the spring. So if students who are counting on non-need-based aid are rejected or deferred from a “dream college” in the fall, it may make sense to skip the next round of ED in order to compare aid offers in April.

Legal, Ethical … and Effective:

Overall, although students who play the ED I/ED II game may be subject to criticism for their fickle hearts, I’ve actually seen many happy endings that resulted from this ploy. Students must keep in mind, however, that if the ED II school is their own second choice but is equally selective as the ED I school that already said “No” or “Not now,” then more bad news may be in the offing. (But, given the sometimes-capricious nature of the admissions process, this isn’t always true.) The savviest students (and parents) typically ratchet down their sights when applying to the ED II college following an ED I denial or deferral.

Some of the winning combinations I’ve seen in recent years include:

Bowdoin (deferred ED I); Bates (admitted ED II)
Middlebury (deferred ED I); Hamilton (admitted, ED II)
Washington U. in St. Louis (deferred ED I); Emory (admitted ED II)
U. of Richmond (deferred ED I); Hobart and William Smith (admitted ED II)
Dartmouth (rejected ED I … makes it easier to pick an ED II school); Colgate (admitted ED II)

Once a student has been deferred by an ED I college, it is completely legal and ethical to apply elsewhere … even via a binding option. The signed commitment to the ED I school will vaporize once the ink has dried on the deferral notice.

My greatest reservation about this strategy is that sometimes I see students who hastily select an ED II college on the heels of an ED I rejection, much as a scorned lover may jump into a bad rebound relationship too quickly. Since many colleges don’t offer an ED II round (and some have no Early options at all), students can sometimes talk themselves into the schools that do, even if they’re not the most suitable matches.

Yet, more and more, I’m seeing students–perhaps like your son’s friends–who are plotting out their EDI/II choices from the get-go, and as soon as they spot the words “We’re sorry … ” on their first Early decision, they’re hitting the “Submit” button for a second try.

Question: I’ve landed myself in suspension, and I can’t go back to school until a full year has passed. What do I do in this time period? I can’t go to a community college, because suspended students can’t transfer any credits. What do I do until this year is up? What kind of things should I accomplish in this year?

Sorry to hear that you’re in some hot water. I’m not clear from your question if you’ll be returning to your original college once your suspension is over or applying to a new one. But, since you’ve said “Suspension” and not “Expulsion,” I’m going to assume that you haven’t been given a permanent heave-ho and do plan to go back to your old college when you can.

My best suggestion for using your time off in a productive way would be to get an internship or job that is related to your major or prospective career. In today’s economic climate, where many new college grads aren’t finding meaningful work (or any work), it can be a big plus to produce a résumé that includes some experience in your field of interest.

Paid internships, however, tend to be highly competitive. Your chances of landing one while on suspension are probably slim. Sure, you could tell potential employers that you’re simply taking a gap year without offering any of the gory details. But you’ll probably also be asked for references, which could be a deal-breaker if you need one from a college official.

Unpaid internships, however, are a different story. Some are also competitive, but many are not … particularly if your “internship” is really just a glorified volunteer job that you’ve made up for yourself.

For instance, if your major is history, you could trot on down to the closest historic house or museum and offer a chunk of your time. If you’re in education or psychology, you can probably find plenty of opportunities to help out in a nearby school, pre-school, after-school program, etc. Aspiring journalists can contact local newspapers and offer to write reviews of area plays, movies, books, restaurants, etc. Whatever your interests, be creative … try to find a need or niche and fill it.

There is a fine line that separates a “volunteer” post from an “internship.” Typically, with an internship you are actually learning some real skills that connect to the field in question, and you are usually working closely with a staff member who is helping you to learn these skills. A volunteer, on the other hand, may do this same sort of meaningful work or, instead, could be assigned to more menial tasks that will assist the organization but which don’t provide any significant training. For example, at the aforementioned historic house, a “volunteer” may simply take tickets or sell sodas at the snack bar, while an “intern” might give tours or answer questions more substantive than, “How much is a Diet Pepsi?”

So your goal will be to create a position for yourself that you can honestly dub an “internship” when it’s time to put together your résumé or to fill out post-college job applications.

If money is a concern, then your suspension year would also be a good time to get a paying job, even if it’s not one that is good résumé fodder later on. In fact, you can probably find a way to hold down a paying job and also take on an internship. Neither one has to be full-time.

In addition, even if you can’t earn college credits during your suspension year, it doesn’t mean that you can’t enroll in non-credit college courses. This could be a good time to start a new foreign language, learn computer programming, or acquire other helpful skills that you might not have time to study during the usual college term.

If you’re thinking of transferring to a new college, then success at either a paid job or an internship (or both) would help admission officials to see that, whatever you did to screw up, you’ve been able to mend your ways and take on new responsibilities. Taking college classes–even not for credit–would work in your favor as well, showing admission folks that you are serious about your education, even when you’re not officially in school.

Similarly, if you’re considering applying to a different college, you might also want to consider a volunteer job (or internship) that is tied to your infraction. For example, if you were suspended for drug or alcohol-related reasons, you could volunteer at a rehab center or –better yet–design your own program to share the evils of substance abuse with younger teens. This would help admission officials at your transfer school to see that you are taking responsibility for your earlier offense.

Finally, a new college may not have the same restriction on credits earned during your year off. So if you do take some college classes while suspended, you may actually find that some of them do “count,” if you transfer.

As the late, great John Lennon once said, “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” You’re in a predicament right now that you may never have anticipated. But it does sound like you want to make the best of your time away from school, and you certainly can. You may end up having experiences that you wouldn’t have had if you’d stayed on the traditional four-year track, and you might even find that these experiences will serve you well when you finally do finish college.

Question: My son scored a 31 on his ACT in June. He is taking it again tomorrow. If he scores lower this time, will his prospective colleges see this new score–or will they only see it if we send it to them? (Obviously we are happy with the first, but just trying to see if he can improve it by a couple of points.) However, if it would hurt him if he went down, I would not want to take that chance.

Your son may require a college degree … preferably from an elite school of technology …in order to decipher which scores colleges will … and must … see.

Short version (well, sort of):

If your son entered any college names on his ACT registration form (in order to take advantage of the “free” score reports the ACT provides) then those schools he named will receive his new score. (Colleges to which he sent scores in the past will NOT automatically receive the new one if your son did not list them on his latest form.)

Other reasons that colleges might see the new score:

1) Some high schools put them on transcripts. Does yours?

2) Many colleges require that students send ALL test scores. (If your son is applying to colleges with this requirement, it is up to him to forward the scores. The colleges will only get the new score if your son has proactively ordered it.)

Here, for instance, is Yale’s score submission policy:

Yale requires results from all of the SAT I and SAT II tests or all of the ACT tests you have taken. If you choose to fulfill our testing requirement with SAT scores, then it is not necessary to send any scores from the ACT, even if you have taken the ACT. And if you choose to fulfill the requirement using the ACT, you do not need to send us any SAT scores, unless you wish.

However, and this is important, if you elect to use the SAT scores, you must report all scores from all SAT exams (both SAT I and SAT II) that you have taken. If you elect to use ACT scores, you must report all scores from all ACT exams you have taken. And if you choose to use a combination of SAT and ACT results, we require that you report all scores from both agencies.

So if your son is applying to Yale–or to any college with similar requirements–he’s supposed to send in all of his ACT scores if sending in any ACT’s. But, again, this won’t happen automatically if your son did not include a college’s name on the sign-up form.

Finally, if your son’s newest test result turns out to be lower than a 31 and the colleges do get a gander at it, most will still officially “use” the higher score. Granted, if the second score is a lot lower, this may have some subconscious effect on those admission folks who view it. But, with everything else there is to worry about throughout this frustrating process, that should be pretty low on the list.

Question: My child’s high school gives quarter and semester grades. Do colleges just look at just the end-of-semester grades or at all grades?

Most high schools put all grades on the transcript that goes to colleges; some high schools, however, will put only the final grade for each course. (For half-year classes or Block System classes, this is usually the semester grade. At schools with four quarters per class or three trimesters, it will be the cumulative grade for that class, as determined by the teacher at the end of the year.)

Assuming that all grades, not just the final ones, are indeed on the transcript, then college admission officials will look at them but they won’t really “use” them except sometimes as potential puzzle pieces … i.e., to help them to discern patterns or problems. For instance, if an A student ends the year with several B’s, the admission committee may notice that he or she had one disastrous quarter (C’s, D’s, maybe even an F) and A’s in all the others. If concerned, an admission officer might call the school to get more information about why that student slipped so much in that single term (Illness? Family crisis? etc.)

Occasionally, seeing the quarter grades may raise some flags. If a student is bouncing all over the place with up and down marks in every subject, the college folks may question this candidate’s focus and work ethic.

More typically however, the grades don’t vary egregiously from quarter to quarter. So if a “B” student has a “C” in one marking period, the admission committees will barely give this a second glance, and the focus will really be just on the final grade.

Hope that answers your question. Be sure to check with your child’s school so that you’ll know what the colleges will … and won’t … actually see on the transcript.

Question: I believe that I am a very strong student. Over the years I have had a 4.0, and I have been very involved in many activities. However, this is my senior year, and in my first nine weeks I got a C in my math class. All of my other grades were very high, and in both of my AP class I had A’s and B’s. Do you think there is any chance that I will get into college?

Yikes! You need to talk to a good college counselor! You are going to have tons of great college options. Admittedly, getting one “C” might affect your admission chances at some schools … especially the most selective ones. But it won’t be a deal-breaker for sure, and there are certainly many excellent colleges that will welcome an applicant with your record … including that “C.”

Don’t you have a decent guidance counselor at your school to help you determine which colleges will be good fits for you and where you are likely to be accepted? Unless you can’t see beyond the Ivy League and another short list of hyper-competitive colleges, then you will have many great choices. So talk to your counselor, and if that doesn’t help, write back.

Does having a sibling who attends a college increase your chances of getting in? Do admissions officers go back and look at the sibling’s application or look at his or her current GPA?

Having a sibling who attends your target college (or who is an alumnus) will usually work in your favor. Most college administrators feel that, by enrolling more than one member of the same family, it increases the odds that this family will feel connected to this college and thus donate more money … and maybe cheer more loudly and enthusiastically at sporting events, too .

However, at the most competitive colleges (e.g., the Ivies and their ilk) sibling status means next to nothing. There are simply too many siblings who are eager to enroll … and too many non-siblings who are just as qualified (or more so). But, at the majority of other colleges, the sibling “hook” counts at least a little.

College officials do not typically comb through applications or transcripts to check out the matriculated sister or brother. They simply note the connection and may use it in the candidate’s favor, if there are close calls to be made.

Question: I took the September ACT and did much better than before, and that is the one I want the schools to see. I got everything but the writing results. I’m applying to some schools that have Rolling Admission and others with Early Action. I don’t want to hold off on my entire application waiting for the ACT writing results that ACT says may take 3-5 weeks. Should I send in my application now with a self-report of my ACT score and explain how everything is there except my writing results…and I’ll send them as soon as they are available?

Yep. That’s fine. However, if a college requires the Writing test, your verdict may be postponed until that score arrives. Alternatively, if you did decently on the Writing section of your previous ACT, you can self-report that score, noting that it comes from a previous testing. If the rest of your application is strong, the college may not have to wait for your new ACT results … or they may contact your counselor to confirm the Writing test self-report.

Question: I’m applying to UMass Amherst and I called Admissions to ask about the benefits/risks of applying Early Action (non binding) vs. Regular Decision The counselor was very vague and said “I don’t know because I haven’t seen the student pool yet.”

I have good grades and great extracurriculars, but my ACT scores are on the low side for UMass. Is it to my benefit to apply Early Action if I am on the borderline? I couldn’t get a sense from her as to whether if, I’m not accepted Early Action, I would be put in the regular applicant pool or just be rejected.

If you’re interested in UMass Amherst and your greatest deficiency is your ACT score, then you’d still be wise to apply via Early Action. There is really no down side to doing this, assuming that your junior grades weren’t weak, too (and it sounds like they weren’t).

If you’re planning to retake the ACT in October (or take the SAT), you can still submit your scores to UMass, if they’re better than your current score. Even though the November EA deadline will have passed by the time you get new scores, you can ask your school counselor to fax or email them quickly to UMass, if they are indeed scores that you want the admission folks to see. (Then you would have to follow up with an official score report.)

But if your new scores aren’t better … or if you don’t plan to take the test at all (because you’ve already taken it more than once and don’t expect to improve) … it’s still a wise move to show your interest to UMass by getting in the Early pool.

If you’re rejected outright via Early Action, you would be rejected outright via Regular Decision, too. So you might as well get the bad news promptly and move on.

Early Action is NOT a good plan for students who had an especially crummy junior year and who thus should compile some stronger senior grades before colleges get a look at them. It’s also not a good plan for anyone who has scheduled SAT’s or ACT’s for after November, since the college folks won’t see those results before the Early verdicts are handed down.

But, in your case, if you don’t plan to do additional testing (or if you’ve signed up already for the October ACT), then you’re really not taking a risk by aiming for EA at UMass. If the UMass admission official you spoke with sounded vague, she was probably trying to tell you that she can’t predict where you’ll stand in the admission pool until she sees the other candidates (or she may have just been checking her email on her Blackberry and not paying ample attention to you ).

If you end up being a strong applicant in that Early pool, you’ll get in. If you’re a borderline applicant, you’ll get deferred … and later compared to the candidates in the Regular Decision crowd. And if you’re a weak applicant, you’ll be denied … but not because you took a shot at Early Action. This would be your fate any time you apply. So I say to go for it … and good luck!